"I took a deep breath and listened to the old brag of my heart: I am, I am, I am." - Sylvia Plath
It was October 2018, I was freshly sixteen, and the autumn air was crisp. I was reading Sylvia Plath's The Bell Jar for the first time, and it instantly rocked my world. I had picked it up from the Classics section of my high school's library because I recognized the name, but I had no idea what I was in for when I decided to check it out that day.
I have always been candid about my mental health journey, and for most of my teenage years, I experienced severe Seasonal Depression each Fall and Winter. I felt so isolated during those times in my life and there were many nights when I cried myself to sleep because of how alone I felt in my sadness. I often sought solace in media that featured relatable storylines, so everything I consumed at the time had somewhat dark themes. I just needed something tangible to remind me that I wasn't the only one in the world feeling so heavy.
Sylvia Plath got it. I read The Bell Jar and it was as if she had stolen lines from my inner monologue. I immediately knew that someday I would have to get a tattoo dedicated to this book because of how integral it was in my healing process. I felt like I finally had concrete evidence that others had felt the same way as me, even decades before my existence. It breaks my heart that Sylvia Plath's life ended so early and tragically, but I am so thankful for the literature she left behind and the impact it has had on so many people like myself.
To me, this quote is a reminder of all that my existence is worth. I am more than just this moment and this feeling is not forever. I am a daughter, a sister, a friend, and so much more. I am beautiful, I am intelligent, and I am loving. I am breathing, my heart is beating, and I am surviving. Despite it all, I am still here.
I finally got my tattoo in January of this year. I went to Dark Age Tattoo in Denton, and I had a great experience there. I also chose to get it in the font Taylor Swift used for her albums Folklore & Evermore, which I absolutely adore. Overall this tattoo is just a beautiful reminder of survival and strength that I look forward to having by my side for the rest of my life.
Today I want to leave you with a reminder of how much your existence is worth as well. You bring so much into this world and you mean so much to so many people. You have made it through every single one of your worst days so far and you can absolutely continue to push through the rest. I believe in you. We've got this!
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